Eccedentesiast

My throat shuts and my hands tremble at the thought knowing that deep inside of me, there is still the most prominent part of you. The remnants of my heart will never seem to stitch through if I just can't get this right. All I see around me are the shadows tip-toeing through my mind, echoing the words that never came out - and never will. It's a strict diet of words, where only a selected few will seem apt. I never wanted to fall apart as I do now that my heavy heart is weighing me down. I'm stuck on a word that will graffiti my mind like the neighborhood's haunted house. I don't want your look to split my heart's cells into a million fireflies on a flurry. What's to be of my heart that is haunted by the feelings you caused, even when I can still picture you running down the hall into his arms? A million staircases away from me, it seems. I should know better than to put my heart on a line that will turn out to be a train track. Is it possible to kick start my heart back to normal knowing that the engine has run off?

I can't stand faking my walk down the hall, a ghost in your eyes. I slowly drown out into these words I wrote on a note that will sink into me like the kisses you laid on my cheek. I fake every move to avoid the affairs concerning you and your glistening eyes. I don't think anyone looked as beautiful as you do when you're moving past the line. I'll fake these emotions so you'll never find out what I'm hiding inside of myself. My heart is only calling because of the memories in my head. Maybe some day I'll figure my thoughts out, but I probably never will

Amen.